


Small Yowling Creatures

by Januarium



Series: Veni Vidi Vinchy [1]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Banter, Cats, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Post-Canon, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:27:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27351940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Januarium/pseuds/Januarium
Summary: Ships_to_sail prompted: David finds a black and white kitten behind the store and names it Vinchey (as in, Givenchy) before Patrick can stop him.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: Veni Vidi Vinchy [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2000986
Comments: 64
Kudos: 202
Collections: The Rosebudd Ficlets





	Small Yowling Creatures

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ships_to_sail](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ships_to_sail/gifts).



> Wanted to shake off the cobwebs and also was complaining that there should be more cat fics, then I saw ships' prompt. Clearly, it was meant to be.

**iMessage:** Patrick  
  
**David:** So exactly how allergic to cats are you?  
  
**Patrick:** Why would you think I’m allergic to cats?  
  
**David:** Because you said you were?!  
  
**David:** How can we be MARRIED and I don't actually know what you're allergic to  
  
**Patrick:** I’m allergic to penicillin, maybe you got confused.  
  
**David:** You’re suggesting I got cats and antibiotics confused?  
  
**Patrick:** Well, I’m not allergic to cats, so…  
  
**David:** Okay but the first time you came to the store you said that Alexis was activating your allergies with one of the cat fur scarves  
  
**Patrick:** Oh! Uh, that was a joke? And also kind of trying to get her to back off a bit.  
  
**David:** I have been doing every vendor visit to Mrs Smitson and handling all restocks on the scarves for THREE YEARS because of my sister’s aggressive flirting techniques?  
  
**Patrick:** … I did not realise you were doing that. That’s very sweet.  
  
**David:** I’m a very sweet person.  
  
**Patrick:** Sure.  
  
**David:** YOU are the one who said it, don’t ‘sure’ me!  
  
**Patrick:** You are a very sweet and very nice person. I’m sorry I let you think I was allergic to cats for so long, I had honestly totally forgotten. I might have been a bit distracted that day.  
  
**David:** Oh?  
  
**Patrick:** Yeah, there was this really hot guy with a sexy business I wanted to work my way into.  
  
**David:** Work your way into, huh? Tell me more  
  
**Patrick:** Wish I could, but the next part of the seminar’s about to start. Can’t miss quickbook hacks!  
  
**David:** Ugh fine.   
  
**David:** I forgive you for the whole allergy thing by the way.  
  
**David:** You should really keep in mind how very generous and sweet and nice and forgiving I am.  
  
**Patrick:** David, what did you do?  
  
**Patrick:** David  
  
**Patrick:** I am not going to be able to pay attention if you don’t tell me and then I won’t have all that extra time saved.  
  
**David:** Fine.   
  
**David:** This is Vinchy.  
  
[](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7c4861bca4a45c48f01a30e7bb3a9161/81ef61360af3cd08-ae/s640x960/4a1c94da9e8983e2f6f7ab819589d7a9704e2370.png)  
**Patrick:** Why is there a cat in our store?  
  
**David:** She’s actually at the vet right now. Shannon’s checking her over, but she doesn’t have a microchip and there aren’t any posts about her on NextDoor or anything  
  
**Patrick:** You went on NextDoor? To see if anyone was missing a kitten?  
  
**David:** So what if I did  
  
**Patrick:** You HATE NextDoor!  
  
**David:** Listen she was in the back behind the store mewing and you know I can’t ignore annoying little creatures who yowl for my attention  
  
**Patrick:** My only comfort here is that I’m sure you mean Stevie as well as me.  
  
**David:** Duh  
  
**Patrick:** I really do have to go. I look forward to meeting Vinchy when I get home.   
  
**Patrick:** But everything for her is coming out of your clothes budget  
  
**David:** But the cat fur is sure to increase my dry-cleaning costs!  
  
**Patrick:** I guess that’s something you’ll have to figure out, isn’t it?  
  
**David:** Hmph  
  
**Patrick:** I might consider bringing in my lunch a couple more days a week.  
  
**David:** I knew I married you for a reason  
  
**Patrick:** Clearly I married you for your sympathy towards small yowling creatures.  
  
**David:** Exactly  
  
**Patrick:** And I guess the cat is pretty cute.  
  
**David:** Pretty cute? She’s the most beautiful cat ever to live  
  
**Patrick:** That’s what I meant.  
  
**David:** It had better be  
  
**David:** Enjoy your boring seminar  
  
**Patrick:** Oh I will. Try not to spoil the cat too much before I get home.  
  
**David:** I make no promises  
  



End file.
